‘Kids would rather be down the park’: readers reflect on child-free pubs

A growing number of pubs in the UK are restricting or banning children, citing safety concerns, changing atmospheres and lost trade. We asked people their thoughts on adult-only pubs.
Many who contacted us supported child-free pubs, believing adult-only spaces were important, but a good proportion said they would change their mind if children were “properly supervised by parents”.
Others were adamant that pubs should be open to everyone. Here are some of the responses.
‘These kids would rather be down the park’
Sean, 58, says he “loved everything about fatherhood when the kids were little”, but also “relished” time with adult company in pubs.
“Parents today have so many options for family entertainment,” says Sean, who lives in Worthing. “Why spoil it for everyone else? I don’t mind children being in the pub, my problem is when they’re not supervised: some parents treat it like a creche. I take my grandchild to the pub for a meal very occasionally, but they stay at the table with us.”
He has witnessed “kids knocking glasses over with footballs and riding scooters up and down the pub”.
“If you say anything to the parents, it’s an instant argument,” he says. “I look at these kids with their footballs and scooters, and think: they’d rather be down the park.”
While Sean understands pubs have had to change, he believes “they’ve catered for families, but are ignoring their traditional clientele”.
‘If kids are in the pub, people are generally friendlier and there’s a nicer atmosphere’
Phil Smith, from Reading, has teenage children who regularly join him at the pub and have done since they were little.
“There’s nothing better than a weekend where there is a proper mix of people of all ages in the pub,” he says. “It makes it more lively and people are generally friendlier than if it was just blokes.”
He says children and dogs often help create a sociable environment. “The kids chat with the dog then the adults get chatting and it just helps create a really good atmosphere. You just get a lovely mix of people.”
He acknowledges that expectations should be clear. “Obviously, you’ve got to have some rules and standards, but that’s up to the landlord or landlady.”
He also believes pubs can help teach children social behaviour. “They can learn a lot by being around different people about how to behave. It’s little things like manners, saying hello to people, having a little conversation, taking your glass back to the bar and saying thank you,” he says.
For Smith, pubs are fundamentally community spaces. “Pubs are a place you go to meet people. You go to meet your family,” he says. “It’s good for kids to mix with adults at a young age.”
‘Pubs are adult spaces’
Isobel*, 40, from London, believes children should only be allowed in pubs “within certain parameters and at certain times”.
She cites family meals such as Sunday lunch as entirely acceptable, but thinks young children shouldn’t be in pubs “beyond 7pm”.
“I don’t have children myself, but I love kids; I go to pubs for Sunday lunch with my nieces and nephews,” she says.
Isobel says if parents have to give “bored” children screens and tablets to occupy them in the pub they should “turn the sound off or use headphones”, adding “adults should do the same”. She also argues there are many other spaces children can enjoy.
“There is a very disingenuous aspect to this debate from some parents, who argue the reservations people have about children in pubs indicates society is becoming antipathetic towards children, or that children are not welcome ‘in public spaces’,” she says. “This is demonstrably untrue. Our society is considerably more accommodating of children now than it has ever been.
“We are also not talking about public spaces in general, but specifically pubs, which are principally adult spaces.”
‘Pubs are by definition public houses’
William, 40, an English teacher and father of two from Tunbridge Wells, says children should be welcomed in pubs.
“Pubs are, by definition, public houses and should reflect the values of a home: welcome to all, warm, a place for discussion, community and bonding,” he says.
“Barring an element from the community is the opposite and, due to social attitudes not quite aligning yet, primary caregivers are still mostly women, so banning children is sexist as it is often also restricting women.”
While he advocates pubs as “community places”, he emphasises that people should be “respectful” to others. Williams says he takes his two children under five partly to get them “to hang out with a wider range of people”.
“But it is not just an age thing,” says William. “It’s like going to football. People say football is a great equaliser and pubs are too.”
‘We enjoy taking our kids to the pub but they have to stay seated’
Clare, an architect from Newcastle, who has three children, believes children should be allowed in pubs provided parents take responsibility.
“We’ll generally find places that serve food, particularly if they have a children’s menu. They might even have colouring books and games that they provide for the kids,” she says.
“It’s quite a nice thing to do in an afternoon especially in winter, when there’s not a lot to do with the under-fives.”
For Clare, behaviour is key. “We tell them you have to sit down. There’s no running around. It’s just not fair on staff. They are carrying plates of hot food and drinks.”
She brings activities for the children. “We bring play-dough, we might let them watch a show on a tablet,” she says.
“Some days they don’t want to sit still and you end up just having to abort.”
She says they usually go in the afternoon or early evening and are home before bedtime: “If people want to go out for a quiet drink and not be around children, then they can go later in the day.”
*Names have been changed